Same Place, Different Lens
As I write this the night before we leave for San Francisco, I can’t help but think about how much I have grown as a person over the past year since my previous experience on this amazing roller coaster of a trip. Just like I hoped, I can confidently say that my identity- with all it’s different facets- has changed for the better. Almost a year ago today, I was sitting in my bed with the same anticipation, the same anxiousness, and the same “fear of the unknown”. But this time around, although similar, these internal feelings in comparison are drastically different. Who knew in such a short period of time everything would feel so different?
Reading my pre-trip blog from a year ago, I had many hopes for this trip that I am happy to say were fulfilled and then some. I hoped to grow closer with the other students that went on the trip, immerse myself in the art that was around every corner, and most importantly learn more about my identity. One year later, I am closer than ever to many of the students in last year’s cohort where I now gained a small queer family here in Eau Claire- which is something I wanted desperately a year ago. I learned so much about the street art in San Francisco and after our trip educated myself on the historical importance of some of the staple pieces of artwork we walked by daily. And I am happy to say that I have evolved into a queer individual that is more confident in themselves and is proud to be who they are- no matter the setting.
Coming back for the second time around is more exciting than going for the first time. I distinctly remember the places I would get my favorite coffee, the little shops I would peruse before attending a film, and the places and restaurants I want to eat at again- and knowing all of that now will make the experience that more fun the second time around. Being surrounded by the endless amount of queer joy is something that I have missed dearly- and something that I hope is more impactful for me the second time around. It’s important to not take a community like San Francisco for granted, knowing that the ever-growing queer community in San Francisco is not something that is celebrated everywhere as much as it is there. I want to make sure this year I am more cognizant of that and try to compare it to my experiences back home. I’m excited to create a close bond with both the students I already have great relationships with and those that I am still getting to know. One of my favorite parts of the trip last year was how close our group became after the two weeks we were together. I’m looking forward to experiencing that again, and quickly leaving our honeymoon phase on the plane as soon as we land.
In addition to going back to all of the places I have missed so dearly and soaking in all that I have missed; I am also looking forward to watching all of the new queer cinema this year at this year’s Frameline film festival. Through last year’s entire Q-Fest experience, I have learned how to analyze films more critically, and have more nuanced conversations about films with my fellow cohort members. Taking my experience from last year’s film festival with me, I want to make sure at our film festival we represent as many aspects of the queer community as we can. I’m excited to see what films from all over the globe pique my interest. (on a personal note, I’m extremely excited to see all the LESBIANS!!! As it seems like this year there are many films at Frameline that highlight various lesbian relationships). I’m looking forward to the in-depth conversations I am going to have with other students that watch these films with me- as it is always nice to analyze queer experiences with other queer people around you.
In the midst of all the anti-trans and anti-drag legislation that has been spewed throughout the country, I am looking forward to being surrounded by a community that continues to fight for those in our community that are continuously under attack. These next two weeks are going to be full of some of the best memories, where we can all just have fun and be queer for fucks sake!
